shifty

There are many reasons why nurses annoy doctors: (And believe me... They do!).
Here i present some scenarios on a typical night oncall (based on true events):

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Scenario 1

I get a bleep at 4am. (4 freaking am! remember this cos it's important)

Nurse: Hi doctor. Patient X had Gentamicin (an antibiotics) levels done earlier.
Doc: Yes. I know that. I took them myself (at 9pm)
Nurse: Should she get her morning gentamicin?
Doc: Yes, she should. At the same dose. I wrote that in the medical notes. I couldnt tell u because i couldnt find u when i was up there. (U were probably on ur endless breaks). What time is she due for it again?
Nurse: 9am

*facepalm*

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Scenario 2:

Nurse: hi doc, can u review a patient. She had an epistaxis (nosebleed) earlier and her nose was packed by ENT. Now the pack fell out. Can u see her please.
Doctor Awesomeness: Is she still bleeding?
Nurse: errr well, the pack just fell out.
Doctor Awesomeness: yes, you told me that already. My question is.. is she still bleeding? Does she actually need her nose packed again?
Nurse: err, i'll check and call you back.

*she never called me back*

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Scenario 3:

Nurse: hello. Im calling from resus. Are you covering resus?
Doctor: No im not.
Nurse: okay, well.... we've got a 65 year old lady here with acute dyspnoea with saturations of 68%.... Bla bla bla...
Doctor: ......... (Didn't i just tell her i wasn't covering resus?)

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Scenario 4

Nurse: hello doctor. I have a patient on IV antibiotics and needs a cannula.
Doctor Do-a-lot: alright. I'll be up in a sec.
(Trudges along to the ward)
Doctor Do-a-lot: so which one is the patient that needs that cannula.
Nurse: oh, im sorry doctor. She actually already has one. But while u are here..... (Lists a gazillion other jobs for me).
Nurse to other nurse(s): Mary, paddy (yells)... Do u have anything for the doctor while she's here?

*erghhh... I can't even.....*

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And that, my dear Watson, is why nurses annoy the hell out of doctors.