My Vampire Story

The first time I met him was on a Wednesday - post call. He looked awkward at first, quiet, shy and out of place. But once the rounds started he almost too naturally became one of the team. I remember Rita leaning in to me during one of her gossipy moments and whispered, "Don't you think he looks like a vampire, all tall and skinny and pale with that really dark hair?" I didn't really think that.

Well, at least not then.

But today something unexpected happened. We diagnosed one of our patients with bowel carcinoma and booked her for surgical consult. She needed a group and hold and some bloods done before we could transfer her to the regional hospital where the surgical team would take over. I volunteered to do this and started preparing my kit including my favoritest piece of the lot - a butterfly from my stash of saved goodies (Note: A butterfly is the equivalent to a blood taking needle for beginners/dummies). But as I was getting ready to go into her room, he came strutting along slowly looking his usual calm self. 

"Here, let me help you with that," he says to me, taking the kidney dish from my hands. "Oh and Izzy, would you mind getting me an 18G needle and a 20ml syringe please? Thank you." 

He took that humongous needle and gently pushed it into one of her veins. Slowly but surely bright red blood started to trickle into the syringe. It was a slow process but i didn't even noticed. I just remember standing next to him thinking "how could a tall and pale vampire look so sexy doing bloods?" And then my reverie was broken when he asked me for the blood bottles. He took each one and started filling 'em up, and before i knew it, he was done. Maybe it's because i'm still pretty new at this doctoring thing or maybe it's just a girls' thing, but for some odd reason i thought he looked pure sexy doing what he just did. Or maybe, Rita was right and he is a vampire. I mean think about it, only vampires can so effortlessly suck the blood out of people while still maintaining a certain amount of sexiness.

Later that evening, on our way home i said to Rita, "Actually Rita, now that i think about it, i guess he does look a bit like a vampire."

To which, she giggled and declared herself a genius. 

Typical Rita.

=============================================

Sidenote: He only picks up the his phone when I call, never when Rita does. There's only 1 of 2 reasons i can think of as to why he would do that:

1). He thinks I'm so hopeless as a doctor that every time I call for help he needs to get back to me as soon as he can before i kill someone. <---- nah, i'm hopeless but I don't think i'm that hopeless. 

2). He likes me more than Rita. <-- Oh yeah, this theory is a winner! =)

Dear diary.

You don't need to ask. I'm well aware how you're burning with curiosity wondering what my first 2 weeks of being a doctor was like. So here's a quick rundown of the last 12 days i had been working.

11/07/2011, Mon: First day. I woke rather early today. But I took a good hour long curled up in bed trying to calm jumping nerves. And then I took another hour to decide on what to wear. I'm like that sometimes, i suppose. I become nervous and indecisive at the most crucial moment for the most trivial of things. Of course, naturally i missed my bus and had to call the cab. *Argh, I'm not even paid yet and already I've developed bad financial habits*. When i reached the doctor's office where i would spend most of my days I was introduced to my boss, Dr C and colleague Rita. The rest of the team were at induction, so that just leaves us newbies to do all the jobs. And being newbies, we took an awfully long time trying to figure out how things work, where consults go etc. I didn't get home until about 8pm. Bummer.


12/07/2011, Tue: Second day. With the exception of the elusive 3rd intern who supposedly hails from Russia and an SHO who was on study leave, we had a full team today. I was on clinic duty in the afternoon *screamss*. Actually it wasn't too bad. I manage to go through 3 patients in 3 hours, one gout and 2 rheumatoid arthritis. I know, i work slow. *sigh*


13/07/2011, Wed: Today is ward day for me. Ahhh yes, and so the clerical work begins. Writing prescriptions, discharge letters, tidying other people's work... oh what fun it is to be a secretary... errr i mean, doctor.


14/07/2011, Thu: Back at the clinic again. It's osteoporosis day today - little frail old ladies' day, is what i like to call 'em. I didn't really know what to ask so i cheated and eavesdropped on what Sean, my SHO was asking in the next room and copy-cated him.
ME: "So have you noticed any lost in height recently?" 

Little old lady: "Errr, not that i've noticed. Is that something i'm supposed to be worried about??"  

ME: ...........errrr, ermm. yes. i mean no, it's just a general question i ask everyone in clinic. 

Little old lady *with a skeptical look on her face*: (dlm hati) "boleh percaya ke doctor ni?"

15/07/2011, Fri: No clinics, weee~! =) But i'm on extended day today so that means i have to stay on till 9pm, wuuu~! =( 
My Reg dropped a big one on me today and told me that i will be presenting in the next lunchtime medical conference. *Yasser u mean bully!! grr* (oh well, on the bright side at least i'd get it done and over with early on in the game).


16/07/2011, Sat: Being on call on Saturday is a living nightmare! BLOODS BLOODS AND MORE BLOODS! grrrr.. And then those dreaded bleeeps.
*bleep* Dr, please chart warfarin...
*bleep* Dr, please do this.
*bleep* Dr, please review that.
*bleep* Dr, this lady needs an ortho consult.
*bleep* Dr, we need a canulla please.
*bleep* Dr, someone's dying here.... i think. maybe.
*bleep* Dr, I bleep you an hour ago about that consult, remember?
*bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* AAAAARGHHHHHHHHH! I swear if that bleeper goes off again i'd put it into a blender, mash it into small pieces and throw it into the Amazon river as piranha bait. Somehow, as if sensing my distress, that stupid bleeper stopped bleeping at about 7pm. So i went up to the doc's res and watched telly for 2 hours. Bliss.


17/07/2011, Sun: I officially declare myself a professional daytime vampire today. I've probably taken blood from half the hospital at this point. Oh well, at least i'm good at something now. Today I had a frail little old lady (or LOL for short) who keeps trying to desaturate on me. She was down to 82% on 4L O2 at one point. I called my housemate, an SHO and asked her what she thought. She gave me explicit orders on what to do in that situation. So i told the nurses to go up to 5L and i'd review the LOL again in 15 minutes. She was still desaturating. Hmmm.... what should i do next, i wonder? ABG maybe? But i've never done one myself and i doubt i'd be successful. So i bleeped the SHO on call, told him the mess i'm in crying for him to help me. Sean, tall and handsome came to my rescue like a knight in shining armor.


His solution was simple (and i feel utterly stupid for not thinking this myself, brain where have u gone to...?)- put the LOL on venturi mask instead of nasal prong. I mean really, it was that simple... and she didn't desaturate on me again for the rest of the evening, blissfully maintaining her baseline O2 sats of 90-92% on 40% oxygen. I requested a CXR for her, just in case. *Thank u Sean!*


18-22/07/2011, Mon-Fri: Pretty much the same all week through. Rita is on nights this week meaning i was the one manning the wards in the afternoon while the rest of the team were in clinic. But i have such cool-headed and efficient SHOs in the team that most of the ward jobs were done before afternoon, and i'd just sit there with nothing much to do at all. Yippee~! (That's a white lie, i had loads of things to do. But let's not get technical). 

And that concludes my first 12 days of being a doctor. Of course u must understand that I've kept a large portion of the gritty details out of this log  mostly due to confidentiality (*tipu* actually malu nak disclose all my stupid blunders), but i'm sure you get the gist of what i do each day. =)

So that's 2 weeks down, 50 weeks to go. Fuhhh~~